Chapter 0: Prologue

What would you do if a wife suddenly fell from the sky?

When you become an adult, you actually start to seriously consider such ridiculous delusions.

I’m twenty-seven years old, a working adult entering my sixth year in the workforce. I’ve reached a respectable age, and my perspective on marriage has shifted.

I used to think marriage was just a pile of added hassles—a loss of freedom, the so-called “graveyard of life.” I thought living with another person was fundamentally impossible for me. But lately, I’ve been feeling it acutely.

I want to get married.

I want to skip the whole “finding a girlfriend” phase and go straight to the wedding.

I want a wife who is good at cooking, attentive, and welcomes me home with a smile. I want her in my house starting today.

In other words, if she was the ideal wife, I’d accept her even if she literally fell out of the sky—

Bzzzt. My cell phone received a new email.

『Good job at work today! ♡♡ Would you prefer meat or fish for dinner? If you have a request, let me know by this evening! ♡ I know work is tough, but hang in there for the afternoon! From your wife ♡』

“—Senpai! Are you listening to me, Senpai?!”

“—Huh!?”

I panic, snapping my flip phone shut and looking at the desk next to mine.

“Please don’t trip out on your own fantasies while looking at your phone during work hours.”

My junior colleague, Ayako Senga, was staring at me with dead, judgmental eyes.

“Let’s do some work, okay, Senpaaaai? By the way, this has nothing to do with work, but…”

“There is absolutely no consistency in what you just said.”

“Oh, it’s about a magazine, so technically it is related to work. Look at this article. Doesn’t this look like another scoop that’ll make Bunka fly off the shelves?”

Senga pointed at her computer screen.

“…I really don’t want to look.”

“It’s the kind of stuff you need to know—”

“Fine, fine… What is it? ‘Popular actress in five-timing scandal’… Five people? That’s impressive.”

It was the kind of weekly magazine scoop you see often these days, yet somehow never get tired of.

“And here are the internet comments reacting to it. She’s getting bashed hard—called a slut, accused of sleeping her way to the top, the works.”

Swish. Senga scrolled through the browser.

“Stop, stop it!? Don’t show me weird stuff!”

“Ahaha. You haven’t changed a bit, have you, Senpai? That’s hilarious.”

‘Flaming’—getting canceled online—is not something you should do, nor is it something you should watch.

That is what I, Kenichi Hinosaka, believe.

However, people in every era love gossip, and gossip has exceptionally good chemistry with the internet. Anyone can easily pick up a scandalous story and hurl abuse from the safety of online anonymity.

Once the flames of public opinion are ignited, the fire doesn’t stop until it swallows everything and burns it all to ash.

We are truly living in the Great Age of Flaming.

“Your ‘Flaming Phobia’ really makes no sense, Senpai. It’s not like you’re the one on fire.”

“…I just don’t want to get involved with irresponsible internet rumors.”

“But the issue of Bunka that sold the best recently was the feature on that popular young actor’s scandal involving indecency with a minor. Are you actually keeping up with the trends?”

“Well, to a certain extent. They cover it on TV and in magazines, too.”

“If you don’t follow the net, you won’t understand the public’s real reaction. Man, I actually liked him quite a bit, but making a move on a JK? That’s a no-go.”

“……………………Yeah, that’s a no-go.”

“Why did you just switch to fake Kansai dialect? Isn’t that suspicious? Wait, Senpai, did you make a move on a high school girl? Is this a potential flaming scandal?”

I question her love for gossip sometimes, honestly…

“Nobody made a move on a high school girl. I haven’t done… anything… to a high schooler.”

“Well, living a normal life, you wouldn’t exactly stumble across scandal material anyway.”

I wasn’t lying.

Truly, I haven’t done anything crazy like making a move on a high school girl.

It’s just that recently, due to certain unavoidable circumstances… I sort of married a middle school girl.

That’s not really something to make a fuss about. It’s not something to make a fuss about………… right?